Friday, February 9, 2007

I didn't get much sleep

last night because of this whole progress report, my DS is going to fail school and it's all my fault, thing.

It is hard enough to deal with this without his father telling me that it is all the teachers fault, I'm being to hard on him, restricting him doesn't do anything but make him feel alone...bla..bla..bla.

As if that isn't enough, my DS told me this morning, when I asked him if he thought I enjoyed punishing him and did he understand why it was happening, he said; "Dad asked me last night if I still loved you since you'd taken all my stuff away".


What kind of a question is that to ask a kid that is supposed to be learning the consequences of his actions (or lack of actions)? That really shows support and all working toward the same goal doesn't it?

I wrote a long email to him from work yesterday in response to some of his statements to me and if he answered it, he didn't copy it to the home email. Joy, Joy. Something to look forward to when I get to work today.

OH, while you all are agreeing that taking EVERY piece of electronic equipment out of my sons room, telling him that he had to do the 11 missed Science assignments (this weekend)-or all 23 if he couldn't remember which ones he had missed is awful let me tell you what I found when I went through his Book bag, besides the Pre-progress report the science teacher had sent home Friday or the several other things that needed to be signed or his video game player. (They are not allowed on campus. When questioned he said he had it to play on the bus. !!! Guess that explains why he isn't making friends on the bus, his nose is stuck in the video game)

He had FORGED my initials on the reading logs for his Science class.

Yes, you read correctly.

His science teacher had asked me yesterday if I was signing his logs & I said yes, sort of knowing that I hadn't. DS has me sign a reading log (occasionally) so it could have been the science one. NOPE. DS had been doing it for me. I had him get the dictionary and read what Forgery meant, I circled all my initials on the logs and wrote FORGERY and then signed my name, and then I wrote across all of the logs that the teacher was to accept my full signature only in the future.

My DS excuse for signing for me? He had forgotten to get me to sign so he did it. Hmmmmmmmm- 7 times???

I talked to my DS on the way to the bus stop this morning and asked him if he understood why he was being punished and did he think I was being to hard on him. He said that he doesn't think it is fair that he has to be closed up in his room all weekend. He should do chores or something. This from the child that can spend 5 days in his room playing video games without coming out and has to be reminded to do the one chore he's responsible for now. He is also insisting that he doesn't have time to do the assignments during class. EVERY DAY?? Every Class?? Good grief!

If any of you have advise on how to handle the DS and/or his Dad please feel free to comment.

BTW, the jail comment from yesterday was referring to the boy..not me for killing him if that's what you thought. I know I said I favor spanking kids, but he is alittle to old for that.

Or maybe not.

Goodness knows nothing else is working.

Til later.....................


Jenn said...

From Experience..the cleaning thing could really work! When I had Ashley living with me, she put me through total HE** with her school work. She did somee of the same stuff. She hated cleaning. She too was a hermit so I knew that cleaning, MY STYLE CLEANING, would really get to her. When I say CLEAN I mean: dusting everything, scrubbing tubs & toliets, etc. BUT You have a spotless house so it's not like you could really make a tough cleaning list for him. I do not think you are being too harsh. I would do some sort of reward system with him. If he brings home his work & lets you check every bit of it for 2 weeks, he can have ONE toy back, and so on. I would also start a homework log. Get one of those small homework pads, have him write every class, have each TEACHER sign that he has turned in the night befores homework. If they have email, get their emails and be in direct communication with them throughout the week but don't let DS know that you have their email, so he'll be shocked when you know what he is doing at all times, lol. He may start minding his P's & Q's then if he thinks you have superhero powers. Oh and as for the EX...He needs a swift kick to the rear end! He's is deliberetly trying to play him against you and that is obvious. I don't know what to tell you there b/c he is always going to be that way!
I love you hang in there!!!! Sorry so long!

just-jessie said...

Man, Cheryl, I hope he gets it. Bonk him over the head for me :)

nicolby7 said...

WOW!!! You really got your hands full Huh? I don't think your being to hard on him.
How else is he to learn. Somewhere along the way he dropped the ball. I wonder, for a drastic measure, if you could arrange a jail or juvie field trip.
Sounds a little extreme, however, if he saw where and what uneducated people end up, well maybe, just maybe he might straighten up and fly right.
Forget ex-DH, he really sounds ignorant in all this. To ask DS if he still loved you. What an A$$!
Keep your head up and aI do hope this gets better for the both of you. Maybe I should include HSS too!
How stress full. Sorry to hear about it. BTW, I wanna come back over some time a scrap. Miss you and Michele! Although she seems busier than ever.